Monday, September 29, 2014

Traels and Animals

So wen we goes on Roxie Trael Rides, ther is often animal encounners.

This is OK for the most part becuz these amimals runs away from my Roxie greatness. Som times tho they does scaring of me anyway.

Like there is this one time that I on a trael, and things is ALL scarey! Ther is lots to be scared of onna trail on this day. An so every time we passes a tree stomp, I is all SNOOOOOORT at it.




Mom is tired of this, natch. So she is all "You big baby" and ""Stomps is not scarey" and all this blah blah. 

Then we coms to an other stomp. An Mom is all "It is not scarey, i promise!" And I is all "really?"

And then the stomp MOVES.



By which i meen. 






And the worse is, ther is bunches of baby stomp birds under her! So they is all runnding around like "PEEP PEEP EEP PEEP MOMMY" and Mom Ogly Bird is all "FLAPPY SQUAAWK BABIES OH NOOOOOOOOO" And I is all "MOM YOU LIAR YOU IS A BIG LIAR MOM AT ME I WILL HAETE YOU AS SOON AS I AM FINISHED JOMPING AROUND" and Mom is all "OH JEEBUS EFF WORD TURKLEY BLAH BLAH HUMAN SOUNDS"

Everything turns out OK. 

But just as a annowncement. Stomps move and they will flap at you. An also your Mom is not ever never to be trusted. 

Wednesday, September 3, 2014


Ther has been som quesstions abowt mah Roxie butt brand stamp thing. So I will tell you about all this.

So the veternary man comes. I knows he is veternary and i DONUT trust him. He coms at my buttocksie with clippers an I is all "SNOOOOOORT GET AWAY I DONUT KNOW WHAT THOSE ARE" even tho I do in fact know whut those are. So Mom is all "OH MAH GAW YOU BIG BABY" and clippers a square in my bottum anyway. :(

Then I gets a shot and this is ALSO terble. Shots is so bad. They goes in your skin an is hurty and DANGEROS. I reesist but the man gives me a shot any ways. >:(

Then I gets so sleepy.

Then they has a big sillver can with a thingy in it. An they pull the big brass thingy (picsured up there) out of the can an presses it to my clippered spot! And the thingy is SO COLD. It hurts! I is all sleepy but still I is like "I MUST PROTEST SERIOSLY" so I dances away! But they comes back an puts the cold thingy back on me!

Then it is all done but it still hurts so bad! Furst, the thingy leaves this deesign on me. It is pressed into mah Roxie skin.


I haete. I SNOOZY-haete.

Then i wakes up an I is all "UPSET!" an I tears arownd my passture with Trixie.

Play thru the pains!

Then after a little bit, this brannd swells up and gets all oozy an owwie!

Then it gets all gross and scabby!


Evenshually it heels up an I grows white hairs there.

Mom tells me that this deesign means that I is in her herd an that no one may steel me. I is the only horse here who has one. Mom says I is the only horse worth keeping. :]

Overall tho. This is a holy unhappie experiense. I donut liek this an i also donut recommend that anyone does this to them selves.