Sunday, May 20, 2018

So heer is the tale

The Tale of Makin A Babbo

By: Roxie

So. Backstory is boring but i will do some. I is a pritty horse and i is pergenat.


Now. Wen last we left off. I is pregent and gettin big. Like even bigger than usual. And babbo is squirming. This is all normal. You wants a babby, you has to put up with some sliding around and kicking in your insides.

Eating for two amirite?
I mostly spends my time moping and hating Fang.


Hating Fang


But then. My udder starts to get SOBIG. And it's all big and sore and mom tries to itch it an this is nice of her. It is like that for two exact weeks and then.

I'm sorry hoomains. I has to say it. Hide your hooman babies or something or donit let them read this.

It starts LEAKING.

I mean. Gross.

It leaks for a day an a half and the leak gets more and it gets kinda white and so Mom is all "Hay Roxie i be out in the barn with you tonight K" and I is like "whatever mom goodnight zzzZzzzzZzzzzZ" cuz I kinda don't believe her.

But then real late at night. Things start to hurt in my bellie like I is DYING. And then there is a splash. An some pushing. And Mom comes and puts on my haltur like that is gonna make it better. And then she puts a tube in my mouf and feeds me gross medisine like that is going to help except that it kinda did a little but that's not importent. So i continues to die. It is terble you guys. Finally I is like "GOODBYE WORLD I'M SORRY THERE IS STILL SOME GRASSES LEFT UNEATED" and i goes down on the ground to die.

Wile I is down there I think "Hay maybe I can save my own life if I can just poo" so i do that. I poo SO HARD. And this giant poo comes out. But it is unlike regular poo because it is MOVING. And I look back and it has a FACE. It's like "hi momma" and I is all "WHUT" and I looks some more an then I is like "Oh my horse gods. You are a babby. YOU ARE MY ROXIE BABY."

So i mean. Things still hurt an i is tired so i rests for a couple min an then jump up becuz I is a tough lady and also becuz babbo is trying to stand up wile not quite all the way out of me. And babby squirms around and wiggles and swims and gets up and falls down and gets up some more and is all wobblebaby and I is all talking to her and being like "good work little facepoop" becuz I is a good momma. And then she wobbles around and puts everything in her mouf including my leaky udderbits and then everything is right in the world pretty much.

If you need me for the next few months. I will be busy touching my Halo baby.


kbryan said...

It is refreshing to read a "real, true to life" birthing story including a few of the grusome details. Poor Roxie having to suffer so, but what a reward! Halo is a beautiful baby! I bet Roxie is glad not to be prego any more. But remember, she is still eating for two! :)

Lisa said...

Well done, Roxie! What a BEAUTIFUL babbo you did make!

D. Arcy said...

Ok. Who is the baby daddy!!! Curious minds want to know!!!! My mare will tell her
Baby daddy if you tell yours...;)

Liz Stout said...

Best birth story ever. Touch your Halo baby for me! So cute.

Roxie said...

My baby daddy is a nice young fella who is a welsh pony an his name is Willpower

ltd said...

So awesome. Congratulations!

nettie said...